How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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