Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I think people are normalizing furries
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
