i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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