I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
