Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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