well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize