Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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