But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
We're like a lot better than the average bears
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
