i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
