be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Randomize
