then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
