So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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