How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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