Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i dont even know how to be here
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You've changed since you got that strap on
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
