just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
