I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
