I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize
