Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
i believe in u and ur pee
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
