man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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