the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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