My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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