Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
