And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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