so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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