well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
