And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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