Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
