He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Holy sore nipples Batman
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Sext me about skeletons
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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