And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
