For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
