he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
