I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
