Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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