he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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