i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
