what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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