She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
