My brain says no but my pants say off.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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