I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
