Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
