There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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