i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
she looked like the before picture.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize