Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
