how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
