So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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