And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Oh god it's open bar.
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