question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize