i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
