i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
