im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
