that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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